Adoption Non-News and My Out-of-Whack Vision

Last fall, Wade and I became aware of a seven-year-old boy who was possibly going to become available for adoption. At that point his arrangements weren't totally cleared, and so we would have to wait to learn the nitty gritty details of his life. And so we waited.

Then last week, all in the course of a few days, we learned he was officially available for adoption ("Are you still interested in learning more about him?" "Yes!"), found out a family would be chosen for him the next day ("Are you seriously interested in being considered for his forever family?" "Yes!"), then were told that another family had been chosen for him. It was a brief but intense emotional roller coaster ride!

We were disappointed, but not heartbroken, when we found out that we wouldn't get the chance to meet this young man and possibly welcome him into our family. We recognized that this simply wasn't God's plan for our lives, and blessed be the Lord that His will was done and not ours.

One thing does bother me quite a lot about the whole situation though. All along the way, there were details -- so many details! -- regarding how we found out about him, his hobbies and interests, his educational needs, his mental/emotional health, his relationship with his biological family, his very (Biblical) name, that just screamed "THIS IS A PERFECT FIT!" I couldn't help but think that this must be a "God thing."

And apparently I was wrong. What I thought was God, was not. I translated "THIS IS EXACTLY WHAT I WANT!" into "THIS MUST BE GOD'S WILL!"

And I wonder how many other details and situations in my life I'm reading wrongly. In striving to recognize God in every part of my life, am I imagining Him working in ways that He is not? And shouldn't I be able to recognize the One I claim to love and serve above all others? How can I become more attuned to His will and less focused on what looks good from my (limited, human, imperfect) perception?

"If anyone lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives freely to all." ~ James 1. Dear Lord, please give me wisdom. I am lacking!